So, was your New Year’s resolution to be more creative with your sex life? If yes… good for you!
Personally, I feel that our sexuality is an important part of our mental and physical well- being. The development of sexual play should be given just as much attention as every other part of ourselves. Besides, it is its own form of exercise, can give great relief and is so much fun!
Overcoming Sexual Insecurities
Sometimes people want to experiment sexually, but they worry if they do, there’s something wrong with them or that they’re a deviant. I hear these and other similar constricting concerns from people of all ages and sexual orientations.
The bottom line is that many of us do want to try new kinky, erotic sexual activities with at least simple sex toys. And, if we can overcome the fear of what others think, life can become so much more enjoyable!
Some people want to try playing with (new & different) sex toys, but just don’t know how to choose them. Others are curious about role playing but are embarrassed to tell anyone. If these (or other) sexual desires & stresses are truly in your head, know that none of them are insurmountable.
Over the coming year, I plan on addressing ways I’ve made sexuality more approachable, acceptable and enjoyable in my head, my body, both alone and with my partner. In this particular post, I’ve focused on some simple sex toys for the novice as well as the experienced player. Hopefully, my suggestions spark your interest and make your selection process for role playing with sex toys that much easier…
**I am not a doctor and am not going to analyze any issues that interfere with anyone’s sex play. Instead, I’m going to proceed as if you, my reader has decided to throw caution to the wind and get on with sexual experimentation!
It wasn’t until the ’70’s when I left suburban NY for the San Francisco Bay Area that I finally was able to live and experience what my sexually adventurous nature had yearned for. Today those times bring wisdom that has made this blog possible. I’ll recommend simple sex toys (and other sexual play ideas) that have made my sexuality develop over the years. Who knows… you might decide to add some of them to your own chest of sexy, kinky play toys and ideas.
Oh, and if my personal preferences (fetishes or kinks) coincide with yours, lucky you! But, if you don’t share the same proclivities, for peat’s sake find someone whose kink parallels your own & learn everything you can about it… Believe me, over time it’ll pay off for yourself (and possibly for your partners.)
“I want to be sexually bound.”
Men and women both like the idea of being restrained. (Ask them if you don’t know.) If you are used to playing one role (submissive or dominant), perhaps you should try the other one? It might sound awkward, but it might also add an entirely new dimension to your sex life forever!
Whatever body parts you have, the idea of being restrained can be intriguing…
This Frisky 8-Piece Restraint Set is a great way to start some fun playtime! Being controlled by another also lends itself to role play. If you don’t know what to say… Think about what you might want someone to say to you… And be patient with yourself through this new experience.
USE YOUR SAFE WORD!
Also, before you play, remember to always agree on a “safe word.” This way everyone knows the rules and is comfortable. That’s what it’s for. This safe word practice will make the idea of playing again with simple sex toys easier for all involved… And, if the bound person is uncomfortable… Please, use your safe word!
OK… If you love having your nipples pinched, these are a necessary tool for your box. But if nipple play isn’t your thing, there are other ways to use your clips…
Personally, I have never found my nipples an erogenous zone… But I love my clippies! (I even have an endearing name for them.) And there is an erogenous zone where I love to clip mine: On my lower lips. Better known as my pussy lips. Yep, you heard/read me right. This simple sex toy can be enjoyed with a partner… or alone!
The special sweet spot is in the middle of each lip (refer to the featured image above using clothes pins.) It’s where the clip doesn’t hurt when clipped. Really! It’s probably best to find that spot on yourself first. After that spot has been found, tighten them just enough to keep them in place. (Now they are set for your body.)
To begin, I often enjoy walking around with the chain swinging freely between my legs. The weight of the chain causes a tug that I have found personally arousing. Now is a great time to start some kind of fun role play if you are so inclined.
But, don’t leave your First Time Fetish Nipple Teasers on for too long at first. Because when you take them off, the blood moves back into that spot and it can be painful, for just a moment. The longer you leave them on, the more pain you’ll feel when releasing them. Happy clipping!
Besides secretly feeling elegant wearing them, I love how the pearls roll between my lips. It stimulates my clitoris, making it harden and grow. (Just like a penis!)
If I know I have a sexy date that night, (& sometimes even when I don’t) I’ll wear my Crotchless Beaded Lovers Thong during the day. That gets me ready for action when my Toy Master arrives home. And, getting some of my own foreplay going grants him some relief.
The Edge Classic Leather Slapper‘s cracking sound supersedes any pain it might cause. So, this simple sex toy is great for any kind of role play. Know that it could make your sub gasp, wiggle or hopefully even moan.
If desired, it is also a good toy to gauge & possibly grow your pain tolerance levels. It might not be the toughest tool in the shed, but it’s lasting pleasure will keep it in use for many years to “cum.” 🙂